But as I passed one doorway, I saw a young man chivying a maid to stay and talk with him a moment longer. Her eyes were bright and her smile merry as she shook her dark curls at him in sweet rebuke. Raindrops jeweled their cloaks. He looked so earnest and so young in his entreaties that I averted my eyes and hurried past. In the next moment, my heart ached as I realized that Prince Dutiful would never know a moment like that, would never taste the sweetness of a stolen kiss, or the elation and suspense of wondering if the lady would grant him another moment of her company. No. His wife had been chosen for him, and the freshest years of his manhood would be spent in waiting for her to grow to womanhood. I dared not hope they would be happy. The best I could manage was that they would not make one another miserable.
These were my thoughts as I found my way down the winding little street that led to Jinna's door. I halted outside it, and sudden awkwardness flooded me. The door was closed, the windows shuttered. A little glow of candlelight leaked out through one illfitting shutter, but it did not look welcoming. Rather it spoke of the intimacy of home within those walls. It was later than I had thought it was; I would be intruding. I smoothed my hacked hair nervously and promised myself that would not go within, only stand at the door and ask for Hap. I could take him out to a tavern for a beer and some talk. That would be good, I told myself, a good way to show him I considered him a man grown now. I took a breath and tapped lightly at the door.
Within, I heard the scrape of a chair, and the thud of a cat landing on the floor. Then Jinna's voice came through the shuttered window. “Who's there?”
“Fit . . . Tom Badgerlock.” I cursed my awkward tongue. “Look, I'm sorry to call so late, I've been away, and thought I should check on ”
“Tom!” The door was flung wide to my hasty excuses, nearly hitting me as it opened. “Tom Badgerlock, come in, come in!” Jinna had a candle in one hand, but with the other she caught the sleeve of my shirt and drew me inside. The room was dim, lit mostly by the hearth fire. There were two chairs pulled up there with a low table between them. A steaming teapot sat brewing beside an empty cup. A heap of knitting, the needles thrust through it, occupied one chair. She pulled the door firmly shut behind me, and then gestured me toward the hearth. “I've just put on elderberry tea. Would you like a cup?”
“That would be I didn't mean to intrude, I only meant to check on Hap and see how ”
“Here, let me take your wet cloak. Ah, it's drenched! I'll hang it here. Well, sit down, you'll have to wait, for the young scamp isn't here. Truth to tell, I've been thinking to myself that the sooner you came back and had a word with the lad, the better for him. Not that I wish to be telling tales on him, but he wants someone taking a hand with him.”
“Hap?” I asked incredulously. I took a step toward the fire, but her cat chose that moment to wrap himself suddenly against my ankle. I lurched to a halt, barely avoiding stepping on him.
Make a lap. Near the fire.
The assertive little voice rang in my mind. I looked down at him and he looked up at me. For an instant, our gazes brushed, then we both looked aside in instinctive courtesy. But he had already seen the ruins of my soul.
He rubbed his cheek against my leg. Hold the cat. You'll feel better.
I don't think so.
He rubbed against my leg insistently. Hold the cat. don't want to hold the cat.
He reared up suddenly on his hind legs, and hooked his vicious little front claws into both flesh and leggings. Don't talk back! Pick up the cat.
“Fennel, stop that! Where are your manners?” Jinna exclaimed in dismay. She bent toward the ginger pest, but I stooped swiftly, to unhook his claws from my flesh. I freed myself but before I could straighten up, he leapt to my shoulder. For all his size, Fennel had amazing agility. He landed, not heavily, but as if someone had put a large, friendly hand on my shoulder. Hold the cat. You'll feel better.
Steadying him as I stood up was easier than plucking him loose. Jinna clucked and exclaimed, but I assured her it was all right. She drew out one of the chairs that faced the small hearth and smoothed the pillow on it. I sat down, and it tipped back under me. It was a rocker. The moment I was settled, Fennel moved down to my lap and settled himself in a warm mound. I folded my hands atop him in a show of ignoring him. He gave me a sliteyed cat grin. Be nice to me. She loves me best.
It took me a moment to find my thoughts. “Hap?” I said again.
“Hap,” she confirmed. "Who should be abed right now, for his master expects him earlier than the dawn tomorrow.
