Caleb had never questioned Rafiq’s methods or his authority. It had never mattered to him that Rafiq demanded blind obedience. He had always believed he was lucky to be alive and been grateful for Rafiq. Caleb was still grateful and always would be, but until Livvie, Caleb had never known how it felt to have someone care, truly care, for him.
“I think…,” Caleb’s heart hammered hard in his chest, “I think he…sold me.” His flesh felt like it was on fire, like it would burn, crackle, and molt right off his bones.
“Sold? As…as, in…?” Livvie seemed at a loss for words.
Caleb looked her dead in the eyes and steeled himself, “It didn’t happen last week, alright!” He said angrily. “I was young. I don’t even remember how young I was. I have no memories of my life before Narweh. Sometimes, I think I remember something, but I can’t be sure. Even my early years with Narweh get mixed up. I wasn’t born a monster, Livvie.”
Livvie’s face crumpled and she seemed to explode with tears. She wrapped her arms around Caleb’s neck, squeezing him with all her strength, “Oh, god! Oh, Caleb. I’m so sorry I called you that. I’m so sorry.”
Caleb’s emotions were everywhere. He didn’t want her pity. He never wanted pity. Still, he seemed to need Livvie’s arms. He didn’t have it in him to push her away.
“I wasn’t alone. There were six of us,” Caleb said. He held Livvie tight to his chest. “I don’t remember being sold. There wasn’t an auction or anything. I think I came in a box. To this day, I can’t stand cramped spaces – or boats – I hate boats.”
“Things…,” Caleb struggled, “happened to me. Narweh liked to beat me…among other things.” Caleb felt Livvie’s arms tighten around him.
Mine!
“I was getting too old, I think. I was tall compared to the others. I had hair on my balls and under my arms. The men who....” Caleb swallowed hard, “They wanted boys, not men. I think Narweh meant to kill me.”
“Stop,” Livvie sobbed into Caleb’s neck, “I can’t listen anymore.”
Caleb felt something slide loose inside him: shame. Pure, uncut, shame rolled through him. “Don’t love me now you know I used to be a whore?”
He pushed Livvie away and she flopped backward onto the bed. Her red, puffy eyes fixed on Caleb with disdain. “You’re an idiot!” she said and sat up. “I can’t listen anymore because I can’t stand the thought of you being hurt!” She crawled toward Caleb slowly, wary.
Caleb wanted to run, but he remained immobile as Livvie’s words tried to settle into his mind. “It was a long time ago. I made him pay.” Caleb met Livvie’s eyes and saw a flicker of realization light her features.
“The bikers,” she whispered.
“Yes,” Caleb said. He cleared his throat, trying to keep calm when all he wanted was to destroy something in a fit of murderous rage.
Livvie nodded, “Those men deserved to die.” Caleb reared back, incredulous. Livvie continued, “Narweh deserved to die, too. And I…I get why you can’t let this go.”
“You do?” Caleb’s heart thudded in his ears.
Livvie smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes, “Yes, Caleb.”
“But…?” Caleb prodded.
Livvie’s mouth turned down in the corners, “I can’t let you replace me. I couldn’t live with myself, Caleb. I couldn’t live…with you.”
“Maybe it’s not up to you!” Caleb snapped.
Livvie held up her hand, her fingers curled under as she reached for Caleb. She approached him slowly, as one would a wild animal.
Caleb had the desire to push her hand away, but the sorrow on Livvie’s face gave him pause. He let her touch his face and he marveled at how much affection he could feel in her simple, yet complex touch. He closed his eyes and let himself feel loved, just for a few seconds to commit it to memory. It hurt to think it might be the first and last time anyone ever touched him in such a way.
“I can’t wait two years for you to come get me, Caleb. I’m done being the damsel in distress. I don’t need anyone to save me,” she said. Her voice was calm, resolute.
“Livvie…” Caleb began, but she put her fingers to his lips.
“I’ll do it, Caleb. I’ll go to the auction and I’ll be perfect. I’ll make the son of a bitch want me,” her breath shuddered, “and when we’re alone…I’ll kill him for you.”
Caleb’s eyes flew open and he shook his head, “What the f**k are you talking about?”
“You want him dead, right?” Livvie said, “What does it matter who kills him or when? I could poison him or something.”
Caleb couldn’t help but smile, even as he knew he would never let her do such a thing. The fact she would even offer….
“I thought you weren’t interested in revenge?” Caleb teased.
“I’m not interested in my revenge, Caleb. But for you….” Livvie whispered, and her eyes said the rest.
Caleb lunged toward Livvie, toppling her backward onto the bed. When Livvie gasped in surprise, he took the opportunity to kiss her. He wished he couldn’t taste Kid in her mouth, but he refused to let it stop him. He needed this. He needed Livvie and her love. His heart had never felt so flooded. He felt he could burst open with the strength and force of it, nothing but need and desire would come pouring out of him.
He put everything he felt, but couldn’t put into words, into his kiss. His hands held on to Livvie, pressing her closer, deeper into his body. His inability to touch every part of her at one time seemed a great injustice.
Closer!
Mine!
He broke away from the kiss, only because he needed her permission. He was done taking anything from her she wasn’t willing to give. “Can I….” Fuck you? Didn’t seem right. Make love to you? So, f**king cheesy.
“Yes, Caleb! For f**ksake, yes!” Livvie cried and pulled Caleb back down into their kiss.
Caleb chuckled softly into her mouth, but quickly regained his bearings. He wanted this to be perfect. For the both of them. Despite how his own body protested, he pulled himself up and off the bed. He held out his hand for Livvie before he spoke, “I want to take a shower. I’ve waited a long time for this and I just want it to be us. I only want to smell, you.”
Livvie blushed, but didn’t say anything. She took Caleb’s hand and followed close behind him as they entered the bathroom to wash all traces of the other man away.
Beneath the flood of warm water, he kissed Livvie. Only hours before, he’d told her he would never kiss her again. What an idiot he’d been! Pressed against her, his bare skin against hers, he regretted every horrible thing he had done to Livvie. He decided he would do anything to make it up to her. He would beg her forgiveness. He would bare his soul. He would bleed and die if he had to, but he would never hurt Livvie again.
“I love you,” she said between kisses.
“Shh,” Caleb whispered against her mouth. He knew she wanted him to say the words. He wanted to say them as well, but he didn’t want to lie. Caleb was a monster. Monsters didn’t love. He cared. He hungered. He lusted. He felt more than he ever dreamed possible, and yet…he couldn’t be sure it was love. He wouldn’t lie.
Caleb went to his knees, kissing a trail across Livvie’s body as he went. He sucked water from her ni**les, drawing her taut flesh into his mouth in long, greedy pulls. He licked under her br**sts and down her ribs. He worshipped her hips and belly. Finally, he parted her legs to find the source of her womanhood.
He could smell her arousal, see the redness of her swollen clit as it peeked out from under her hood. Pushing her legs farther apart, he stared at the open petals of her inner lips. Soon, his c**k would be sliding past them and into the heat of her. She would be his – irrevocably. Caleb leaned forward and kissed her lips as he would her mouth.
She moaned and her hands moved toward Caleb’s head, pushing him closer. It was exactly where Caleb wanted to be – closer. He teased her lips gently with the tip of this tongue, letting them part slowly as her arousal and his mouth made Livvie wetter. As she rocked on his face, he pushed deeper, tasting her inside.
“Oh, Caleb,” she sighed. “Oh, god. You feel so good.”
Caleb’s hands weren’t idle. They traveled up and down her legs, sometimes spreading her thighs, other times scratching up the backs of her legs, forcing her up on her toes. He let them keep traveling as he licked, sucked, and even f**ked Livvie with his tongue.
“I’m gonna come,” Livvie panted. Caleb grabbed her ass with both hands, holding her in place as he moaned into her pu**y and she came on his tongue.
“Caleb!” she shouted and fisted his hair. She couldn’t move her hips, so she pulled him close.
Once Livvie had finished shivering, she let go of Caleb’s hair. It had hurt, but he was okay with pain, especially under the circumstances. He stood slowly, letting his knees work out the pain from having been on the shower floor for so long and turned off the water.
Livvie reached out and grasped his cock, startling him. He was hard and her touch made him eager. As quickly as was safely possible, he led the way out of the shower and back into the bedroom. To hell with towels.
