Della
Blaire had called and asked me to have lunch with her that day. I hadn't spoken to her since the incident with Angelina except for the few times I'd seen her with Rush around the club. It was odd because I felt like we had a bond now that we'd faced down Angelina together. She'd been my hero that night. She made me want to be tough. I wasn't tough and I wanted to be so bad.
I walked out of Woods's old office, which he'd moved me into and told me to decorate any way I wanted. Blaire was headed toward me.
"You even have an office now," Blaire said, smiling brightly. I had to admit I loved having an office. Specifically this office. I had many good memories there. I didn't intend to change anything about it.
"Yes, I feel very official," I replied.
"Good. I'm glad Woods has you. You're perfect for him."
I didn't agree with her. He could have done better---so much better---but I was working toward being good enough. Strong enough. Tough enough.
"Ready for lunch?" I asked, wanting to change the subject.
"I'm starving. Nate isn't sleeping as much as he used to. He keeps me busy but it's wonderful. Downside is, I don't have a lot of time to eat. When Rush is home he helps out a ton and makes sure I have time to eat. Anyway, I'm ready for a baby-free meal."
Nate was Rush and Blaire's baby boy. He was an adorable mixture of the two of them. I didn't normally think guys with piercings and that rough rock star look were attractive, but Rush Finlay holding a baby in his arms was very nice to look at.
"Is Rush with Nate now?" I asked as we walked to the dining room.
"Yes. They're going fishing, which means Nate is going to sit on a blanket and eat sand, if he can get to the edge of the blanket, and Rush is going to fish for about five minutes before realizing he can't fish and watch Nate at the same time. Then he'll stop fishing and they'll sit at the edge of the water and let their feet get wet."
The happiness in Blaire's voice was unmistakable. Rush Finlay made her happy. She made him happy. That was what I had with Woods but it was different. Rush could leave her alone with their baby and not worry about her zoning out and getting lost in her head. He could love her and not worry that his baby would inherit her mental illness. Their love was easy. It was the kind that would go the distance. What Woods and I had wasn't.
Every time I saw Rush holding his baby, I wanted that for Woods. The proud look in his eyes and joy on his face. I couldn't give him that.
"You okay?" Blaire's voice broke into my thoughts and I forced a smile.
"I'm sorry. Work on the brain. I promise to shut it off and be a good lunch date," I assured her.
"As long as it's work that's causing that distressed look on your face," Blaire replied, sounding like she didn't believe me.
I hadn't been brave enough to talk to my best friend, Braden, about this. She loved me fiercely and thought I could do no wrong. She also thought I could be a mother and stable wife. She lived in a fairy tale that I didn't allow myself to step into. Would Blaire be the same way, or would she see my side and understand my fears?
The hostess snapped to attention when she saw me and led us to Woods's table. He had told the staff in the dining room that his table should be available at my convenience.
"Oh, we get the good table," Blaire said, grinning, as we sat down. "I guess you're the boss now, too."
"Woods made a big deal out of them always seating me here." I felt myself blush and Blaire laughed.
"That's sweet," she said.
I wasn't sure how to respond to that. It was sweet. Woods was always sweet. He was impossible to get mad at. Even when he deserved it. Like when he made the new server, Ken, almost pee his pants for talking to me.
Jimmy came strutting out of the kitchen, grinning at us.
"Looks like we're going to get special service, too," I said, nodding my head toward Jimmy.
"Well, hello, my beauties. I didn't know I was gonna get this lucky today," he said with a southern drawl that made most women drool over him.
"Hello, Jimmy," Blaire said.
"You broke loose from baby duty, I see," he teased.
"It's never a duty," she replied.
"Sweet tea for both of you?" he asked.
"Sparkling mineral water for me," Blaire told him.
His eyebrows shot up and then he laughed. "Well look at Alabama getting all sophisticated with her water choices. Damn, baby girl, I remember when you drank water out of the tap."
Blaire laughed. "It's better for the baby than soda or tea. That's all."
"Mmm-hmm, next you're gonna be ordering sushi with that raw shit in it," he said, shaking his finger at her. Then he shot us both a wink and turned to head back to the kitchen.
"He's a mess," Blaire said with fondness in her tone.
"Yes he is, but he runs the kitchen so well. I don't know what we'd do without him."
Blaire leaned back in her seat and crossed her legs. "You'd beg and plead with him to come back. That's what you'd do."
She knew exactly how important he was. She had once been a server there, too. Jimmy had been her first friend in Rosemary. The story went that she came into town looking for her daddy and found her daddy's new wife's son instead. Rush Finlay wasn't a fan of her father and disliked her on the spot. But he let her live in the maid's room while she worked for Woods and made some money until her dad got back from France with Rush's mom.
Rush treated her poorly but ended up falling for her against his will. They had more pain to work through in the end and a lie that tore them apart. I wouldn't have believed any of it seeing them now, but Bethy had told me all about it. She'd been Blaire's friend through it all.
"Did my gun effectively run off the wicked witch, or did Woods do that?" Blaire asked.
"I think it was your gun and the fact that she was scared of what Woods would do once he found out. She left that night and we haven't seen or heard from her since. Mrs. Kerrington isn't very happy with Woods about the whole thing. She blames him for her leaving."
"You're welcome to tell her that it was all me," Blaire said with a smile.
"Thank you, but I don't think it will matter. She doesn't approve of me. She wants Angelina for Woods."
Blaire sighed. "I understand that. I have a mother-in-law who hates me so badly she hasn't even seen her only grandchild."
Blaire was poised and beautiful. She wasn't dealing with something like a mental illness, so you would think her mother-in-law would have loved her. But she represented something to Rush's mother that couldn't ever go away. It was part of the dark past she shared with Blaire's dad.
"I heard Rush's dad was in town last week visiting Nate," I said, remembering how the entire club had talked nonstop about the drummer from Slacker Demon being in town. He was a legend, just like the rock band he was a part of.
"Yes. Dean is a wonderful grandfather. It is a bit surreal to see him cuddling with Nate and singing to him. Nate adores the man. I love to watch Rush's face while he witnesses his dad with his son. It brings me to tears every time."
"I would imagine that is special," I replied. I didn't have parents who would see any child I might have one day. If I ever felt safe enough to have a child.
