Jill didn’t have an answer, although she knew she should. Was she waiting to hear back from the partners at her old firm in San Francisco? Did she think that they would suddenly discover Lyle was a rat fink lying weasel dog and beg her to return?
“Pathetic but true,” she said as she began to change her clothes.
Her gaze dropped to the phone on the nightstand. Should she call Gracie and tell her that Riley was back in town? Would her friend want to know? Jill had warned him there would be a lot of interest in his return and he’d given her permission to say he was going to be around dealing with the contents of his uncle’s will and that was it.
Gracie would have a lot of questions that Jill wasn’t prepared to answer. Nor did she think her friend wanted to hear that her one-time crush still looked like a walking, breathing poster for a female sexual fantasy.
She pulled a T-shirt over her head and walked to her window. From there she could see Mac’s house. The truck was in the driveway. It was too early for lights to be on, but she could hear noises from next door. He was home.
She ached for him and not just for the afternoon of lovemaking that had been derailed. She missed talking to him—both for what he had to say and for the sound of his voice. She missed laughing with him and seeing him smile. She missed Emily.
But after what had happened, she wasn’t sure if they were still speaking. She could tell herself that none of it was her fault, but she still felt some measure of guilt. Rudy had come to Los Lobos because of her. She hadn’t listened when Mac had warned her the man was trouble. Then Mac had lost his temper and taken it out on Andy Murphy. Not that the wife-beater didn’t deserve it, but there were consequences for Mac. Huge ones.
Still, there was no point in wishing for the moon, she told herself as she turned away from the window and walked toward the stairs. If Mac wanted to get in touch with her, he knew exactly where to find her. She wasn’t going to be the one to go crawling to him.
SOMETIME AFTER TEN, Mac told himself he had to go up to bed. The way his days were going, he needed his sleep to stay sharp, or at least not to be stupid again.
He and Emily had spent a quiet evening together, playing games, then watching a video. He treasured the closeness as she snuggled against him, giving him the honor of holding Elvis. He liked the way she smiled at him during the funny parts of the movie and how she’d flung herself at him when Ariel had gotten herself into some trouble and had whispered she knew Mac could save her.
He liked being both her father and her hero. So what the hell was going to happen to the love in her eyes when he was officially charged and lost custody of his daughter?
He didn’t want to think about it. He didn’t want to deal with it, but there it was—waiting for him. Lurking and giving him a knot in his stomach. He’d been a fool and now he had to pay the price.
“Anything but Emily,” he said aloud. He would cut off his arm rather than lose her.
A knock on the door caused him to sit up and glance at his watch. Who would come calling now?
He knew who he wanted it to be, but Jill wasn’t likely to show up at his door. Not after all that had happened between them. Still, he hadn’t heard a car pull up.
Expectation propelled him to his feet. He crossed to the door and pulled it open. Pleasure poured through him.
“It’s not what you think,” Jill said as she pushed past him and walked into the living room. “I am absolutely not crawling here. I’m walking with strength and dignity. As your friend and as an attorney, I feel it’s important to discuss certain things with you. As with all free advice, you can ignore it, but in this case, you’d be a complete ass to do so. Am I making myself clear?”
She stood there, spine stiff, shoulders back. Determination radiated from her and, even in her shorts and T-shirt, she looked damned impressive. He would have wanted her under any circumstances, but it was her long curly hair that did him in.
He grabbed her and pulled her against him. “I’ve missed you,” he said right before he kissed her.
Her mouth instantly yielded. Her arms wrapped around his neck and she molded her body to his. Her scent and her heat surrounded him, offering comfort and promise. Or maybe that’s what he wanted to read into it all.
She was the one who drew back a few seconds later. “We have to talk.”
Four words every man in the universe, except maybe Dr. Phil, would rather eat glass than hear. “Can’t we just go upstairs and make love instead?”
She hesitated. “I’m tempted.”
“Good.”
He took her hand with the intent to lead the way, but instead he found himself curling his fingers around hers and tugging her toward the sofa. He could never admit this to another living soul, especially not another guy, but maybe they did need to talk.
“How are you?” she asked when she had settled next to him on the sofa, her body angled toward his, their knees touching.
“Fine.”
She shook her head. “I don’t think so.”
“Okay, I feel like shit. What was I thinking?” He straightened and slid to the front of the sofa where he rested his elbows on his knees and dropped his head to his hands. “I risked everything by punching out that bastard. He’s a human cockroach and he’s going to cost me Emily.”
“You don’t know that.”
He turned his head to look at her. “I’m going to be formally charged. Hollis has already called to set up an appointment. I’ll put him off as long as I can, but you and I both know it’s just a matter of time.”
Jill rubbed her hand across his back. “You need a lawyer, Mac. Someone brilliant. I want to ask around and find the right person.”
“Not you?”
“No. First of all, we have a personal relationship and that’s a serious no-no. Second, I don’t handle criminal cases.”
“A lawyer isn’t going to be able to change what I did. I lost my temper and now I have to pay the price.”
“But Andy deserved it.”
“Are you sure?” Mac straightened. “Does anyone deserve to be beaten by someone in authority?”
“He does it to his wife. He’s breaking bones.”
“An eye for an eye?” he asked.
She glared at him. “If you’re going to take the moral high ground, I’m not having this conversation with you.”
“Okay. Then just have sex with me.” He grabbed her hand and pulled it toward him. Knowing she was watching, he pressed an openmouthed kiss to her palm and had the satisfaction of feeling her shiver.
“You’re not playing fair,” she whispered.
“I’m a guy, sweetheart, and I want you naked. There is no fair.”
She cupped his jaw. “I have to tell you something first.”
He didn’t like the sound of that. “I’m reasonably confident it’s not that you were once a man.”
The corners of her lips quivered, but she didn’t smile. “No, it’s not that. Riley Whitefield is back in town and he might be staying for a while.”
Mac already knew that firsthand, but he appreciated Jill wanting to tell him.
“I know. We ran into each other earlier today.”
Her eyes widened. “You’re kidding. How was it?”
“Weird.” He flopped back on the sofa. “It’s been a long time and yet it felt like yesterday. Funny how Riley was the last guy I had a fight with and he shows up now. Maybe it’s a sign.”
“Of what?”
“I haven’t a clue.”
She shifted close and rested her hand on his chest. “Did you guys talk?”
“We spoke, but it wasn’t friendly.”
“You used to be best friends. What happened?”
“A lot of things.”
He put his hand on top of hers and laced their fingers together. He and Riley had been best friends forever. They’d been on the fringe of bad, getting into trouble, staying out late, drinking and, as they got older, racing their cars. But at the beginning of their senior year, something had happened to fundamentally change their relationship. Mac had stolen Judge Strathern’s Caddy and had taken it for a joyride. And he’d been caught.
“When your dad came to talk to me after I stole his car, I thought I was totally screwed,” Mac admitted, remembering the fear of that long-ago morning. A long night in the local jail had given him plenty of time to imagine the worst.
“He can be pretty intimidating,” she admitted. “If you haven’t seen him dancing around the house in his underwear.”
Mac chuckled. “I’ll admit I never have.”
“I did way too many times. When I was a kid I thought it was funny, but as I got older, it began to scar my psyche.”
“Well, that morning he terrified the hell out of me. You know he took me up to Lompoc. A few hours in a prison cell put me right on to the straight and narrow.”
She sighed. “Riley didn’t like losing his partner in crime.”
“You got it.”
“So you fought?”
“At first he was just mad and kept expecting me to change. One day we had it out and I told him I wasn’t interested in getting in trouble. I wanted to graduate from high school and join the Marines. He laughed and I punched him.”
“About that anger-management book Hollis gave you…”
“Yeah, yeah. So I have a temper. I’m doing better. Or I was until Andy Murphy pissed me off.” Mac didn’t want to think about that. “Riley and I both walked away bloodied and bruised. That was the end of our friend ship. We graduated. I left town and he married Pam.”
“Which lasted all of five months,” Jill said. “It turned out she wasn’t as pregnant as she’d claimed. Then Riley took off to parts unknown.”
“So what happened to him?” he asked.
“I haven’t a clue. I didn’t ask and he didn’t say.”
“How long is he back for?”
She rested her head on his shoulder. “I’m thinking until next spring, but I’m not sure.”
He knew there was more she wasn’t telling him. In formation about the will, but he wasn’t going to ask. He didn’t want Jill violating her ethical code for him. Not that she would if he asked. She had principles. He liked that.
“I was wrong,” she said in a low voice.
“Can I have that in writing?”
She nudged him with her knee. “I’m serious, Mac. I feel horrible about what happened with Rudy. You were right about everything and I didn’t listen. I thought I knew him. I thought because of all the legitimate business dealings we’d had that he wasn’t a criminal. But he is and now he’s brought gambling to Los Lobos. I never wanted that.”
“I know.” He turned and kissed her forehead.
“Aren’t you mad at me?”
“I can be if you’d like.”
She looked at him. “I’m serious.”
“So am I. I’m not mad. You made a mistake. It’s nice to know I don’t have a corner on that market.”
“He’s gone. Bev’s with him. I think they’re in San Francisco.”
“I knew that. Bev called to let me know she wouldn’t be around to look after Em.”
She squeezed her eyes shut. “I thought coming back here would be so simple. I thought I’d hate everything and leave at the first chance I got. But it’s not like that. I got another job offer. This one is in San Diego and it’s really great.”
A sharp pain cut through his chest. No way in hell did he want to try to figure out what that meant.
“You should take it,” he said.
“Should I? I’m not sure. Something doesn’t feel right and I don’t know what. Everything is confusing. I hate this town. Really, really hate it.”
