“No . . . I haven’t. I . . .”
Trevor brushed his hand over mine, and I realized I was gripping his forearm in a clawlike vise. “You okay?” he asked.
I quickly let go, turned on my heel, and walked back the way we had come. I pulled out my phone and dialed my dad’s number.
“Hi, baby. It’s getting late. Where are you?”
“Pioneer Plaza Cemetery.”
He went quiet.
“What’s going on?”
“Addie, we’ll talk about this later. This isn’t an over-the-phone kind of conversation. I need to talk to your mother. This is something that will take some explanation.”
“Is it her? Is it grandma? That’s all I want to know right now.”
“Later.”
“Dad. Just one answer.”
“Addie—”
“Don’t I deserve to know that much?”
“Yes.”
The cold air nipped at my cheeks. “Yes I deserve to know, or yes it’s her?”
“Both.”
I hung up the phone. I had never hung up on my dad, but I didn’t care. My mind raced through my grandmother’s funeral. I remembered watching them lower her casket into the earth. I remembered throwing a rose down with her, barely seeing it fall through my tears. So they moved her here? But why? Was he making some kind of statement? One that said, I’m never going back?
I had to call Laila. She’d know what to do. I walked half a block away and dialed her number. A chorus of birds squawked in the tree above me, and I moved out from under it, not needing to add bird crap to my night. Laila didn’t answer.
I slid my phone into my pocket.
“What’s going on?” Rowan asked when I got to the car, where they were waiting.
“Is everything okay?” Trevor asked.
“I don’t know.”
“You didn’t know she was buried here?”
I met Trevor’s eyes, mine stinging with frustration or sadness or something that didn’t feel good. He took a step forward as though tempted to comfort me but then stopped. “Come on, we’ll take you home.”
CHAPTER 14
Laila: I think I sold myself short.
Eli elbowed me. “How come I can only read your mind? You’re not cheating, are you?”
We cut through the park and headed toward the gaming arena where I had asked Kalan to meet me. I only hoped she still needed that favor. “Why would I cheat?”
He sighed, somehow knowing that my lack of answer was my answer. “That’s not going to help me, so don’t.”
“Maybe you’re trying for the wrong ability. Have you ever thought of that?”
“My early indicators said I have a tendency toward Telepathy.”
“Yeah, well, maybe your early indicators were wrong. Do you want to try some of my tracks and see if they feel right?”
“I had absolutely no traces of mind blocking.”
I knew this. I was just trying to make him feel better about his lack of progress. “Just relax. It will come when it’s supposed to.”
He kicked at the ground as we walked. “Or maybe it will never come.”
I sighed. “I have something for you. Remind me when we get home.” I hadn’t given him the program from Face because I wasn’t sure I could trust it. It was one thing to take a risk with my own ability, but to do it for him was completely different. But how could I screw up something that hadn’t even Presented yet? I’d tell him what it was and give him the choice.
“Hey, there’s Leonard,” Eli said as we got closer.
I followed his finger and saw his friend, Kalan’s brother. Kalan stood next to him. The only reason I had agreed to bring Eli here was because I knew she’d be here. “Have fun,” I said. “I’ll be over there on the bench. And don’t take all night. It’s getting late, and I’m not your taxi.”
“So what’s the definition of someone who drives me anywhere I want to go, then?”
I smacked him on the back and then shoved him for good measure. He laughed and ran off.
“Kalan!” I waved, and she looked my way, then came to join me.
“Hey. You wanted to talk?” she asked.
We reached the bench and sat down. “Two things. One, I need a list of all the students and their abilities from the office. Well, actually, just one student in particular.” Kalan worked in the school office. I knew she could get it for me.
“Laila, it’s winter break. The school is on lockdown.”
“That should make it easier, then. Nobody there to ask questions.”
“The word lock is in lockdown for a reason.”
“What if I could get you the code to the office?”
“A code to the office is the least of my worries.”
I sighed and watched my brother and her brother step on the platform and get scanned into the game. A huge holographic three-headed monster popped up between Eli and Leonard. They immediately got to work fighting it.
“Whose ability are you looking for, anyway?”
“Connor.”
“Connor Bradshaw?”
“Yes. Do you know it?”
“No. Anybody else and I might’ve known, but Connor is . . . a loner.”
I growled. This was supposed to be easy. I would advance my ability. I would give Addie her memories back. I would stop feeling guilty. The end.
“So what’s the other thing?” she asked.
“Did you still want someone’s memory Erased?”
She took a gasp of air. Then she nodded twice, her eyes shining with held-in tears. I had thought long and hard about this. She was asking for a memory of herself back. I could do this for her. But I wasn’t exactly one for charity. Of course I needed something in return.
“I’ll do it for five hundred dollars.”
She was quiet for a while, then said, “Three hundred and the list from the office. That’s the best I can do.”
I cracked my knuckles. I was the one who’d brought it up, but without the full amount, was it worth it? The tears in her eyes tugged at my guilt. What had happened to her? “Did someone hurt you?”
She wrung her hands together until red marks streaked her skin. “He doesn’t deserve to remember how much.”
Three hundred bucks. That was over half the money I needed for Face, for lesson one. Kalan was right. It was her memory. She was asking me to get it back for her, to help her, that was all. “Okay. Whose memory?”
CHAPTER 15
Addie: I would make a horrible spy.
I waved good-bye to Rowan and Trevor, then walked into the house. My dad wasn’t in the main room, so I knocked once at his bedroom door and walked in. The sink water in the bathroom was running. I sat on his bed and waited, arms crossed.
His keys, wallet, and cell phone sat on his dresser, reminding me he had recently taken something of mine. I moved the stuff on his dresser, looking for my flash drive. It wasn’t there. I went to his nightstand and searched through his top drawer, digging beneath a notebook. I didn’t like to invade my dad’s privacy, but I was angry about finding my grandmother’s grave and sick of the secrets my parents had been keeping from me. I wanted my DAA program back.
The handle to his bathroom door rattled, and I quickly shut the nightstand, empty-handed, and turned around. I’d have to find it later. I leaned back against the nightstand, trying to act casual, knowing that “acting” was impossible to do around a lie detector.
He cursed quietly under his breath. “You scared me.”
I didn’t say a word. I didn’t have to lie about how angry I felt.
He sat down on the bed and patted a spot next to him for me to join him. I stayed where I was.
“So your grandmother is buried here.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m not going back there. She’s my mother. I wanted her here.”
He wasn’t going back. That thought stopped me for a moment. It had been my original thought as to why he’d had her moved here, but I still couldn’t believe someone, especially my dad, would want to leave the Compound forever. “You’re not going back?”
His determined gaze softened. “If you need me to be there for something, I will be there. But other than that, this is my home now.”
I nodded. That admission alone made the divorce so much more real to me. “I didn’t see Grandpa’s grave. Why didn’t you bring him here as well?”
He looked at his hands. “That one might take awhile.”
He should’ve told me this before. “You thought I’d be angry?”
“It’s not that.”
“Then what? Because I’m trying my hardest to understand why you wouldn’t tell me this.”
“It’s complicated.”
“No, not really. You open your mouth and you say, ‘Addie, I’ve decided to move my parents’ graves into the Norm world, where I can see them on a more regular basis.’ It’s easy.”
“Did you want me to tell you that before or after I dropped the divorce announcement on you?”
I opened my mouth to speak and then closed it again with a sigh. He was right. It was complicated.
“Am I forgiven?”
My mind flashed back to the Tower and the scar-faced man with the tablet who said I had two family members on the Outside. Was it possible he meant my grandma? “If that’s the whole truth, then yes.” I met his eyes. “Is it?”
“Yes.”
“Seriously, Dad, I can’t stand finding things out like this. If there’s anything else, just tell me. I promise I can handle a lot more than you think I can.”
“I know.” He grabbed my hand and squeezed.
“I’m glad you have her here. I know you and grandma were close.” I squeezed his hand back. “Like us, right?”
He smiled. “Right.”
I stood to leave but then remembered what I had been sitting on, his nightstand, and what I had been trying to find inside it. “What about my flash drive? Why did you take it?”
“You don’t need that.”
“Why?”
“I promise your ability will develop perfectly naturally without it.”
I sighed. “Fine.”
Only it wasn’t fine. I wanted that DAA program. When I got to my room, I pulled out my phone and dialed my mom. It was a little late, but I figured she’d be okay even if I woke her.
“Hello,” she answered after the third ring.
“Hi, Mom.”
“Addie,” she said with a happy sigh. “How are you?”
“I’m okay. Just found out about Grandma tonight.”
“Yes, your father called me a little while ago. I’m sorry we didn’t tell you. It’s just been kind of an ordeal.” She must’ve noted my lack of reassurance, because she added, “There really was a reason. We wanted to wait until both graves were approved for the move, and then your dad was going to take you to see them.”
“Why hasn’t Grandpa’s grave been approved?”
“Because he was a Bureau member, and there are more strings to pull if a person held the title of agent.”
