Alise nodded dumbly. She felt empty and sick. She took a sip of her tea to give herself time to think, but no ideas came to her. “I feel so foolish,” she said softly. She looked at Sedric and apologized, “I’ve dragged you all this way, for nothing it seems. I should have listened to Hest.” She laced her fingers together on the table in front of her and spoke to Althea past a lump in her throat. “I only booked passage on your ship as far as Trehaug. From there, I planned to travel by one of the cargo barges, the small ones. I didn’t buy tickets for our return, because I hoped to stay weeks if not months learning from the dragons.” She reached up to massage her own temples. A storm of a headache was brewing in her skull. She tried to keep tears out of her voice as she asked, “Is it possible to arrange to return to Bingtown immediately?”
“You can travel back with us.” The captain spoke without moving away from his window. There was sympathy in his voice.
“But you should understand that it takes time for us to unload cargo and take on supplies and more cargo.” Althea cautioned her. “And I had planned to visit Malta while we were here. So we will not be immediately returning to Bingtown. You will have to spend a few days in Trehaug while we do so.”
“I understand,” Alise said faintly. “I am sure we will find things to see in Trehaug until you are ready to begin the journey back to Bingtown.”
“Then you don’t plan to even visit Cassarick? I can’t believe that! Alise, you must go. We’ve come so far, it would be foolish not to at least visit it.”
The apparent disappointment in Sedric’s voice startled her. A few minutes ago, he had seemed positively hopeful that their journey had been for naught.
“What would be the point of it?” she asked him dully.
“Well”—he seemed to flounder briefly for a reason—“well, to say that you’d seen what you’d gone to see. Done what you meant to do. You said you wanted to see the young dragons for yourself. Do so.” Suddenly he seemed more confident of his words. He leaned across the table and took her hands. He gazed earnestly into her eyes. “Isn’t that what you’ve been telling Hest you wanted, for years now? Simply to see for yourself ?” He gave her a twisted smile. “Surely you don’t want to go back to Bingtown and admit to him that you came all this way and didn’t even look at a dragon?”
She stared at him. Suddenly she could imagine Hest’s delighted grin at such an admission from her. Bile rose in the back of her throat. No. No. Her disappointment was big enough without letting it be his triumph. She blinked back tears, and suddenly felt a wave of gratitude toward Sedric that he had thought of her and spoken out to save her from such shame. “You’re right,” she said in a shaky voice. She thought of her years of carefully compiled notes, scroll after scroll, page after precisely lettered page. Resolve settled and firmed in her. “You’re right, Sedric. I have to go. The least I must do is see them for myself.” She drew a deeper breath. “I’ve committed a grave error, one that too many scholars fall prey to. I’ve let my expectations and hopes color my opinion. If what I see are deformed and near mindless creatures, then that is what I must observe and document. Just because my studies do not reflect what I hoped to find is no reason to turn aside from them. Thank you, Sedric.” She sat up, squaring her shoulders and met Althea’s measuring gaze. “I will be journeying on to Cassarick.”
Althea slowly nodded. A grim smile of understanding touched her face.
“But we won’t be staying long,” Sedric hastily added. “I suspect that we will still be traveling downriver with you. In fact, I’d like to secure our passage home right now.”
Both Althea and Brashen were looking at Sedric oddly. Alise understood. If she hadn’t known the man, she too would have wondered at his weather-vane spinning. He’d gone so quickly from persuading her that she must go to Cassarick to declaring that they would stay only a very brief time. But she knew why. She sat silent as he discussed with the captain the likely dates of their departure for Bingtown. Without a word, she signed the note for funds for their return tickets. All the while, she looked at Sedric, not with new eyes, but with fond remembrance of their old friendship. He hadn’t wanted to come to the Rain Wilds. She was certain he didn’t want to make the uncomfortable journey by flat-bottom barge to Cassarick. But he would do it, for her sake. He’d help her save face with Hest, no matter the discomfort and inconvenience to himself.
When their business was concluded and she rose from the table, he offered her his arm, just as he always did. As she took it, she looked up at him and smiled. He smiled back and patted her hand reassuringly. “Thank you, my friend,” she said quietly.
