We took the remaining refugees through the tunnels, very nearly the whole way. This soon after the attack, we weren't worried about a mole man ambush. Now that they knew vampires had invaded their home, they were likely fleeing to scattered corners of the sewers, to hide and wait for the monsters to return to the surface. The bigger danger would come from the bleeders up top. Despite the emptiness of the tunnels, progress was slow. Most of the refugees had been hurt, and a couple were severely wounded, slowing our hike to a near crawl. I bit down my impatience and ignored the demon inside telling me to eat a few, to kill off the weak and sick. Dawn wasn't far, and at this rate, we'd barely have enough time to get off the streets and out of the light.
The sky was an ominous gray as we finally made our painstaking way across the empty lot, ignoring the few frozen corpses lying in the weeds. The snow had stopped, and the old school looked like a sullen beast huddled against the cold. I led everyone through the doors, down the shadowy, rubble-strewn halls, to the basement at the bottom of the stairs. It was pitch-black down there and probably freezing, but the room had cement walls, no windows, and a single thick door that barred from the inside. It was the most secure place I knew, in the Fringe, anyway. If the bleeders could get this far, there was no hope for the uninfected humans.
Zeke watched the refugees set up the new camp, waited until blankets had been passed out, fires had been lit, and people had settled in, before turning to me.
"They'll be all right now," he muttered. He'd been coughing the whole way here, and had wrapped a strip of cloth around his nose and mouth to keep the sickness contained. Sweat glistened on his brow, even through the cold, and the fabric below his lips was spattered with red.
I nodded. "At least they'll be safe from the bleeders here." Food was still going to be a problem, but food was always a problem in the Fringe. Zeke suddenly winced and pressed a palm to his forehead, making my stomach clench in worry. "You all right?"
"Yeah, I'm fine. Headache." He dropped his hand, smiling to ease my fear. "Where did Kanin go?"
"He said he was going to find a place to sleep." Kanin had vanished soon after we had showed everyone to the basement, slipping into the darkness without a sound. And in this big, crumbling building with its countless rooms and dark corridors, I'd probably never find him. I would have to follow him soon. The sun was up now, and sluggishness pulled at my eyelids. "I need to get going, too."
"Allie." Zeke sounded uncomfortable, raking a hand through his damp bangs. "Can I...come with you?" he asked, making me blink in surprise. "I don't want to stay down there," he continued, nodding toward the basement door. "Not when I could put the others at risk. I don't want this thing to spread."
I nodded. "Sure."
"Thanks. Hold on just a second." Zeke turned and shrugged out of his pack, placing it down inside the door. "There's food and supplies in there for anyone who needs it," I heard him say to the people in the room. "Try to make it last as long as you can."
I gave him a chiding look as we stepped into the hall again, shaking my head. "You could've used that, too, Zeke."
"They need it more," he replied without hesitation. "Better that it doesn't go to waste. I'm..." He stopped, dropping his gaze, but we both knew the words he was about to say next. I'm not going to be around much longer.
Fear squeezed my insides again, but I didn't say anything as I led him back down the hall, through a door I'd used thousands of times, and into a familiar room.
It was light outside now; the sun would just be peeking its head above the rooftops, but the black bags over the windows did a good job in darkening the room. I didn't need the artificial light to see most everything was how I'd left it. When I was living with Kanin in the old hospital, I had defied his wishes and returned to my old room one night, only to find that two strangers had moved in. Though they'd been killed by Psycho Vamp before they had the chance to really change anything, they had managed to burn my entire book collection to keep themselves warm. That was the last I'd seen of this place before Kanin and I were forced to flee New Covington and go on the run. I didn't know what had become of the two corpses that had been here the night I first met Sarren, but they weren't here now.
Zeke shone the flashlight around curiously, taking everything in. When the beam swept over the mattress and blanket in the corner, he paused, frowning. Scanning the room once more, glimpsing the subtle signs of inhabitation, understanding suddenly dawned on his face. "This...was your room?"
I nodded wearily. "I lived here with my gang, back when I was still human." Picking up an overturned chair, I set it back beneath the table. "It's not much, but it was better than some people had."
I took a candle off the shelf, burned down to just a stump, and turned it in my fingers. Could it be that I'd been human just a few short months ago? It didn't seem possible. "Anyway," I said, replacing it, "go ahead and take the mattress. You look like you could use the sleep. Just keep to the left side-the right edge is kind of pokey."
"What about you?"
"Don't worry about me." I gave him a half smile and moved toward a far corner, away from the windows. "I can sleep on anything now, as long as it's out of the sun. But, I really do have to get to sleep, Ezekiel. I can barely keep my eyes open as it is."
It felt strange, admitting that. At one point, I would never have let anyone but Stick stay in my room. And now, my vampire instincts warned me never to let anyone see where I slept during the day. I knew the older, stronger vampires like Kanin and Salazar could force themselves awake if they had to, and Jackal claimed he could do it as well, but, while I could force myself to stay awake after the sun rose, I had yet to develop the talent of waking up once I'd already gone to sleep. If it were anyone but Zeke, I would've done what Kanin had this evening and slipped away to find a safe, hidden spot to retire, away from fearful humans.
I was still leery of the refugees. I hoped they would stay down in that basement and not go wandering the halls. But there was nothing I could do about them now, and at least my door was locked from the inside.
"Allison." Zeke's voice stopped me as I began to look around for a spot where I could lie back against the wall. "You don't have to... I mean..." He raked a hand through his hair, suddenly embarrassed. "We could share," he finally admitted, not meeting my eyes. "The mattress is big enough."
I stared at him, my stomach doing a little cartwheel. I'd shared the mattress before with Stick, but only for body heat, so that we wouldn't freeze to death on frigid winter nights. This...would be something completely different.
Zeke peered up at my silence, and spots of color tinted his pale cheeks. "That is...if you wanted to. Just to sleep. I wasn't implying that we..." He colored even more fiercely. "Ah, that came out all wrong. I wouldn't do anything, Allie, you know that, right?"
"I know," I said, easing his humiliation. "And, it's not that, Zeke. It's just..." You would be right there, lying next to me. Can I control myself? Would it be too much of a temptation for the monster? I spoke slowly, needing him to understand. "Sleeping next to a vampire might not be the safest thing for you."
Zeke actually chuckled at that, though it turned to a painful cough that made me wince. "I think it's a little late to worry about what's safe now," he rasped. "But, it's your decision, of course. Whatever you want to do."
I wanted to lie down. Fatigue pulled at me, making my thoughts sluggish, my reactions muted. The sun was fully up, and my vampire instincts, the ones screaming at me to go to sleep, were getting too strong to ignore. The thought of being pressed against Zeke, feeling his warmth and his heartbeat as we lay together, was suddenly very, very tempting.
"All right," I murmured, and Zeke's eyebrows rose. "I still don't know if this is a good idea, but..." I walked forward, pulling my sheath over my head and setting it down beside the mattress. If I didn't lie down soon, I was going to fall over. This was as good a place as any.
I didn't look at him as I sank to my knees on the bed. It was thin and threadbare, but instantly familiar. Behind me, I felt Zeke hesitate, then shrug out of his combat vest, dropping it at the corner along with his weapons. The mattress groaned as he settled atop it, his movements stiff and uncomfortable.
"Are you sure you're all right with this?" he asked.
Without answering, I grabbed the blanket and lay back, tossing it over myself before I could change my mind. Zeke paused, then lay down, too, sliding beneath the cover. Though he kept his body from touching mine, his heat filled the space instantly, a cocoon of warmth spreading between us under the blanket. It felt sick, however. Feverish.
Zeke turned to his side, shifting to face the wall, away from me. I felt the mattress shake as he coughed, trying to muffle it in the blanket, and a stab of fear pierced my exhaustion. What if I woke up tomorrow night and there was a corpse lying beside me? What if Zeke died, slipping away from me during the day? I'd never know until the sun went down and it was too late.
I turned toward him, gazing at his lean shoulders. He lay with his head cradled on one arm, his breaths labored and raspy. The back of his neck was bared to me, and I felt my fangs slide out, the Hunger urging me to ease forward and sink my teeth into his flesh. It cared nothing for the fact that biting Zeke would be fatal to me now; all it saw was a sick, vulnerable, unsuspecting human, and the perfect opportunity to strike.
I forced my fangs to retract, and reached out for him, brushing his arm.
He let out a ragged, shaky breath, and his shoulders hunched at my touch. "Allison...?"
"Turn around," I whispered.
He hesitated then shifted to his other side, facing me in the darkness. For a moment, we gazed at each other, our faces an arm's length apart. Zeke's head lay in the crook of his elbow, solemn blue eyes watching me. I could see my own reflection in them, but also the pain that creased his forehead, the sickly heat pouring off him.
"What's wrong?" he whispered after a moment.
I can't lose you. I'm terrified I'm going to watch you die. "I hate this," I finally muttered, my voice just a whisper between us. "I hate being so helpless. I wish this was something I could fight, something I could face one-on-one. I'd have a chance, then."
Zeke, I noticed, was being careful not to move, careful not to reach out and touch me. I caught hints of the longing on his face; it was clear he wanted to, but restrained himself. "I don't believe in fate," he said carefully, "but...I do believe everything happens for a reason. That there is some plan, some meaning to this darkness we live in." He sighed, wrinkling his forehead, his eyes going distant. "Maybe I'm wrong, but it's gotten me this far. It's the reason I fight, the reason I can keep going, despite everything. And it...it led me to you."
The room was much lighter, now. I knew the sun's rays were sliding across the windows behind me, clawing at the barrier. My eyes were heavy; my body felt like it was made of stone. With the last of my strength, I reached out and hooked Zeke's shirt, tugging him forward. He blinked then scooted close so that we were pressed together beneath the covers, his arms wrapped around me and mine around him. His heart pounded against my chest, my nose and jaw were nestled in the hollow of his throat. Temptation and Hunger tried to flare up, to take advantage of this perfect opportunity, but I was half-asleep now, too tired to listen. Not even the sweet blood coursing right below my lips could tempt me at this moment.
"Stay," I whispered, as my eyes flickered shut. "I'm not... letting you go."
I felt him shift in my arms, holding me tighter, tucking my head under his chin. "Only death will take me away from you, vampire girl," he whispered. "And even then, I'll watch over you from wherever I end up."
That was the last thing I heard before sleep pulled me under.
No nightmares. My sleep was blissfully free of the visions, dreams and emotions of my creator. Whether Kanin had finally found some sort of peace or he could control himself now that he wasn't being tortured, the next time I woke, the room was dark, and my thoughts were my own.
But the space beside me was empty.
Zeke? I stood, gazing quickly around the room. The flashlight was gone, as were his combat vest and weapons, and the room was empty save for me. Alarmed, I opened the door and stepped into the halls, searching for him. He wasn't in the dark corridors, or in the room with the refugees, though the door was still shut and locked from the inside. I didn't think he would risk going into the room with them.
So where was he?
I finally caught sight of a lean, blond figure in the open doors that led outside, gazing at the empty lot. It was snowing again, and thick flakes fell softly around him, landing in his hair and spotting his shoulders. Relieved, I strode forward, joining him at the entrance to the school, though he didn't turn to me immediately.
"Zeke, what are you doing?" I asked, scanning the lot for bleeders. It was empty, and the city beyond seemed still. Too quiet.
"I couldn't sleep," Zeke muttered, his voice low and tense. "It was too hot and..." His hand went to his face. "My head is killing me."
Chilled, I took his arm and turned him to face me. His eyes were bloodshot, his skin gaunt and wasted, and his hair was drenched with sweat. Heat poured off him like an ember, that intense, sickly heat that made my stomach turn. We were almost out of time. We had to find Sarren, now.
"Where's Kanin?" I demanded, releasing him and stepping away. "We're leaving. There's no more time to wait. Where is he?"
"I saw him this evening," Zeke said as we ducked back inside. "On the steps to the second floor." He hesitated, his face grim. "Allie...it's not pretty. Prepare yourself."
My dread grew. We hurried through the building, past the door to my room and the hall to the basement, to a flight of crumbling cement stairs leading to the second floor. I'd been up there before when I'd been human, but the gang didn't use it much. The third floor had collapsed on top of it, and most of the rooms were filled with rubble and stone, making it hazardous to navigate.
A dark figure sat on the top steps of the flight, elbows resting on knees and head bowed. Just seeing him like that made me uneasy. He looked like he was in pain-Kanin, the vampire who'd taken three bullets to the chest once and pulled them out again without flinching. Then Kanin raised his head, and I had to bite my lip to keep from crying out in horror.
The skin on his cheeks, forehead and jaw had blackened and was beginning to peel away, showing hints of bone through the wasted flesh. His dark eyes had sunk into his head, leaving black circles beneath them, and were glazed over with pain. The skin along his arms and the backs of his hands had darkened, too, ominous patches getting ready to crack and rot away, as the virus ravaging his body from the inside finally started to break through.
"Oh, Kanin..." The words came out choked. I didn't even know what to say-it was too horrible. And terrifying. One day. One day for the virus to spread this far. What will he look like in another twenty-four hours?
"Are we ready to leave?" His voice was as deep and as calm as ever. You would never guess he was in terrible pain unless you noticed the glassy look in his eyes, the tight set of his jaw. I nodded, and Kanin pushed himself upright, glancing at Zeke behind me. "Will you be able to travel?"
"I can make it."
He didn't argue, only nodded and started down the stairs. "Then let's go. It will take us several hours to reach Sector Two on foot."
The door to the basement hall was open as we walked by, and one of the refugees hovered in the frame, watching us pass. His face was hard as he stared at us, eyes narrowed in suspicion and fear. When Zeke glanced at him, his lips thinned, and he vanished through the frame without a word, the door clicking shut behind him.
Back in the sewers, we moved quickly, feeling the night slipping away from us. Neither Kanin nor Zeke spoke much, saving their strength for walking. Zeke's coughs seemed to have slowed, but he would often press a hand to his eyes or temple, gritting his teeth, and a few times he stumbled, as if he couldn't quite see what was on the ground in front of him. It made me sick with worry, for both him and Kanin. Kanin, of course, didn't make a sound, marching on with grim determination, his jaw set. But the one time he stopped to get his bearings, leaning heavily against a wall with his shoulders hunched, I could tell how awful he was feeling.
They're dying, was the thought in my head, constantly tormenting me with every step, every labored breath from Zeke or look of pain from my sire. They're dying, and I can't help them. I can't do anything for them. Dammit, what good is immortality if I can't help the ones I care about? If I have to spend eternity alone?
Overhead, the bleeders roamed the streets, muttering and laughing to themselves. Or they would scream at nothing, beat at cars, walls and each other, claw at their faces. And though I didn't want to, I wondered when Zeke would start showing signs of that insanity. The screaming and blind rage, the tearing at eyes and skin until the face was a mangled, bloody mess. What would I do if he started that?
Just make it quick. Don't let me suffer, or become a danger to anyone else.
Ice formed in my veins, chilling me to the bone, as the realization hit all at once. I might have to kill them. Both of them. If we couldn't get to Sarren in time, Zeke would turn on us, and Kanin would be in so much agony he'd be better off dead. I hadn't let myself think we could fail until now, but if Sarren didn't have a cure, I would have to...
I veered away from those thoughts, my throat dangerously tight. There was no one else. It would have to be me. It wasn't a question of whether I could do it. I would not let Kanin suffer like that vampire in the hospital room, his eyes begging me to kill him. If it came down to that choice, I would take his head and put him out of his misery at last. I knew my sire well enough to know he would want it that way.
But Zeke. I could barely stand to think about it. It didn't seem right that we had just found each other, that I had just let myself think that we could make this work, and he might have to die. By my hand.
But the world wasn't fair, and I'd known that for a while. If I had to kill Kanin and Zeke, so be it. I would mourn and scream and grieve their loss, and I would never get that close to anyone again, but I would not let them suffer needless agony because I couldn't let them go.
Someone, however, would pay for their deaths. Sarren and Salazar would pay, and now I could add Jackal to that list, as well. If we couldn't find a cure in time, not even the Prince himself would be safe from my retribution. If either of them died, there would be hell to pay.
But I wasn't giving up yet.
After a few hours of walking, Zeke began to stumble badly, and Kanin stopped, turning to give him an appraising look.
"Take a break," he said, nodding to a section of wall that had crumbled-large, flat stones providing a few places to sit. I was struck by how awful he looked, the blackened wounds on his cheeks and forehead spreading a bit more each time I looked at him. "We're going topside soon, and we'll need to hurry to get out of the open. Rest a few minutes."
"I'm fine," Zeke said stubbornly, though his voice was ragged. "I can keep going."
"It's not negotiable." Kanin's eyes narrowed and he gestured more firmly to the rocks. "Sit."
Zeke complied, dropping onto a stone block, rubbing his eyes. Kanin leaned against a wall, wincing slightly, as if the pressure of the cement against his back was painful. I hoped more wounds had not opened up beneath his clothes.
"How far are we from the hospital?" I asked Kanin. "I don't remember going this way the last time we were here."
"A couple more hours, depending how crowded the streets are." Kanin closed his eyes for a moment, a tiny flicker of pain crossing his features. "This way is a bit longer, but we've stayed belowground nearly the whole way there. I would rather avoid the infected for as long as we can."
"What if Sarren isn't there?"
Kanin smiled humorlessly. "I think the more pressing question would be, what if he is?"
I shivered. Then we'd probably have to fight him. He certainly wouldn't just give us the cure, even if he had one. I hoped I was up for it. I hoped Kanin and Zeke were up for it. Sarren was certainly no pushover when it came to violence.
"Sarren." Dropping his hands, Zeke leaned forward, resting his forearms on his knees. For a moment, he appeared deep in thought. "I remember Jeb telling me something," he muttered at last, staring into the darkness, "about the vampire who killed his family. He was sixteen when it happened, and I only got the story out of him one time. He never spoke of it again, ever."
I blinked. Jebbadiah as a kid, a teenager like me. I tried to picture it and failed. The dour, unsmiling old man with the steely eyes was all I could see.
"What happened?" I asked.
Zeke's brow furrowed. "I don't remember the whole story. But, the way Jeb told it-his father came home one night, frantic, saying they had to leave town, that Malachi had done something horrible, and that something was coming for them. So they loaded everyone into the car, Jeb and his younger sister in the back, and left without taking anything."
Another shock. Jebbadiah had had a sister. How old would she be now? I wondered. And would Jeb be the same bitter, angry old man if she had lived? I didn't know anything about him, I realized. Even Zeke, his adopted son, barely knew his father at all.
I wondered how many more secrets Jebbadiah had taken with him to the grave.
"They thought they had gotten away," Zeke continued, oblivious to my thoughts about his father. "But, a few miles out of town, a tall, pale man suddenly appeared in the middle of the road, smiling at them. Jeb's father swerved, and the car went into a gully, rolling down to the bottom. Jeb was thrown clear, but when he crawled back to the car, his sister was dead, his mom was lying against a rock with her head split open and his father was bleeding all over the place. Jeb tried to pull him free, but his father pressed something into his hand, said it must be protected at all costs and told him to run. He wouldn't have listened, except the pale man was coming. So he ran."
Kanin stood silent, unmoving, while I still tried to wrap my head around the thought of Jeb as a teen and a brother, watching his family die. "That was Sarren, wasn't it?" Zeke asked, looking up at Kanin. "Taking revenge by killing the scientists and their families. When you were talking about the lab burning down and the rabids escaping, everything sort of clicked." When Kanin still didn't answer, he gave a humorless chuckle, shaking his head. "It all comes back to you, doesn't it?" he murmured. "The rabids, Sarren, Jackal. Everything."
"If you want vengeance for your father," Kanin finally said, his tone low and weary, "I would ask you to wait until we solve this crises. Afterward, if I am still alive, feel free to join the ranks of every vampire and human who wishes to remove my head, though I fear it is a very, very long line."
"I don't want revenge," Zeke told him before I could speak up. "Not on you, anyway. And not just because of Allison, either." He leveled a piercing stare at Kanin, who regarded him blankly. "You tried to help the scientists before," he said. "Do you still feel the same way? Do you still want to save the human race?" When Kanin frowned, Zeke paused, as if debating with himself whether or not to continue. Finally, he sighed. "If there was a possible cure for Rabidism," he went on slowly, "what would you do to find it, to protect it?"
"Zeke." I stared at him as Kanin straightened, giving him his full attention. "What are you saying?"
He gave me a guilty look. "I wanted to tell you earlier," he began. "But I didn't want to mention it around Jackal or the other vampires. The scientists in Eden...have something. At least, that's what they hope."
I gaped, feeling my stomach drop. "There's a cure?"
"Maybe. It's too soon to tell." He looked at me and Kanin in turn. "With Jeb's research, they've been able to get closer than they ever have before. But they've hit a block. They're missing something crucial. Something that isn't in Eden."
I frowned in confusion, but Kanin closed his eyes. "Vampire blood," he murmured, and my insides went cold.
Vampire blood. The thing that had started it all, that had birthed the rabids and turned the whole world into hell on earth.
And then the real reason Zeke was here, the reason he had tracked me across the country, begged me to go with him to Eden, hit me like a slap in the face. "That's...that's why you wanted me to come with you to Eden?" I asked faintly, looking at Zeke in horror. "You want to hand me over to the scientists, to use as their damn lab rat? So they can stick me in a cage and poke me with needles, like the vampires in the old hospital? Like the humans in the Old D.C. lab, tied to their beds and screaming while they were being experimented on?" My voice was growing louder, the vampire within howling at this betrayal, urging me to attack. My fangs slid out, and I bared them at the human before me. "Is that why you came, Ezekiel?"
"Of course not!" Zeke rose quickly, wincing as he steadied himself. I snarled and backed away from him, and he held out a hand, his voice gentle. "Allie," he pleaded, "you know me better than that. I would never do anything that would hurt or imprison or put you in danger. If that was my only reason for coming, I wouldn't be down here trying to stop Sarren. I would've gotten the blood some other way and gone back to Eden by now." His brow furrowed, and he rubbed his forehead before focusing on me again. "You...you are the only reason I'm here, the only reason I came."
"Are you sure about that?" I asked, forcing my voice not to shake. Against the wall, Kanin watched us, unmoving, but I barely noticed him. "Jeb knew how important the research was, that's why he gave everything he had to get it to Eden. He knew how desperately we need that cure. He would've done anything to find it. What's one vampire to save the entire world?"
"I'm not my father," Zeke said evenly. "And I was going to come looking for you, anyway. Even if there was no cure, I would've still come. If you believe anything at all, believe that. But, Allie, the scientists heard about you from the guards at the gate-they heard the stories about a vampire who didn't immediately slaughter everyone at the clinic. And they asked me a lot of questions about you, and Jeb, and our travels together. When they found out I was planning to leave the island, they asked if I was willing to bring you back to Eden. Not as an experiment or a lab rat-I would never agree to that. But they need vampire blood to continue working on the cure." He sighed, raking a hand down his face. "I know how it sounds," he admitted. "Even I was suspicious at first. But the Eden scientists know what happened at the other lab, how the rabids were created. They're not going to make the same mistakes twice."
"How do you know?" I demanded. "They could be using you, Zeke. They could be lying, just to get you to bring them a vampire. And if that's the case, you won't be able to stop them from turning me into an experiment. I'm not going to Eden just so they can do to me what they did to the vampires sixty years ago."
"I'll go," Kanin said softly.
We turned to stare at him. He shrugged, looking mostly at Zeke. "If I survive this, if we somehow manage to stop Sarren and end the plague, I'll go with you to Eden. And your scientists can use me however they want."
"Kanin," I whispered, appalled. "You can't be serious. You, of all people, should know what could happen. What they created last time. They're doing the same thing!"
Kanin just smiled. "What could they possibly do to make it worse?" he asked. I started to protest, and he cut me off. "I was wrong before," he said, his voice hard. "I allowed the blood of others to be shed, when the sacrifice should have been mine. I've spent a lifetime atoning for that mistake." Pain lit his eyes, the guilt of countless decades weighing him down. "But Ezekiel is right. I cannot let the fear of the past color the future. If a cure is to be found, if the humans still require vampires to create one, at least, this time, the blood on their hands will be mine. It is only fitting. But we must find Sarren first."
"We should get going then," Zeke muttered, and took a staggering step forward. "Because honestly, I don't know how much longer I can keep walking." He pressed the heels of his palms into his eye sockets. "God, it feels like my eyes are going to burst out of my skull."
My anger with him vanished. Stepping forward, I reached up and gently pulled the hands from his burning face, keeping his wrists trapped in my fingers. His eyes, glazed and bloodshot, met mine, and I squeezed his hands.
"We're almost there," I whispered, willing him to keep going, to not give up. "Stay with us, Zeke. You promised me you wouldn't stop."
He gazed at me, not making any move to free himself. "I'll remember my promise, vampire girl," he whispered back, forcing the words out through the agony. "If you remember yours."
