He laughed harder, "I do. That is a feat. Do you have proof of the affairs?"
I scoffed, "I saw him."
He nodded, "Had you been taking the pills I prescribed you, when you saw him? He says you take them with liquor and that’s not their intended use. It can lead to hallucinations and mental instability and other things."
I felt my expression grow somber, "What?"
He put his hands up, "Just some food for thought."
I pointed, "If you'll excuse me, I am going to lie down now."
He stood, passing me a bottle of pills, "This is a slightly-stronger prescription. Let's give it a whirl for a couple weeks and then we will reassess after the wedding. I assure you this is all wedding jitters and very normal."
He stood and left the room.
I sat, staring at the pills. I wanted to scream and destroy things, but I couldn't. I needed to keep it under wraps until 5:00 tonight. Then I could head for the city. Muriel was coming over then. She had agreed to my evil plan. I felt like the energy had been sucked out of me and crawled into my bed.
I just needed a little nap.
The nap turned into a sleep. I woke with a start. My sister was shaking me by the foot and attempting to drag me from the bed. "You have to wake up. J.D. get up. It's 5:30."
I felt the cottonmouth and knew immediately, my mother had drugged me. I looked at the tea she had made me, still on the makeup table.
"Mom."
My sister nodded, "She roofied you. You need to get up."
I shook my head, "I'm going to be sick."
She dragged me from the bed, "Get sick out the window of my SUV. I'll pack us a couple plastic baggies." She wrapped my arm around her neck and helped me from the room. The shrill laugh of Muriel filled the house. I looked at my sister, "She came."
She nodded, "And Father has been ever so silent since she asked to speak to him in private."
I smiled, "Good. Fuck him." My words were weak and exhausted. Brandi carried me down the back stairs and across the lawn. She ran for her SUV as my legs woke up a bit. She started the SUV and drove like a wild woman. The traffic was nuts.
"Shit, I hope we don’t miss him."
She passed me her phone, "Call."
I dialed but his phone went to voicemail, "France, it's me. Wait for me. I'm coming. Please wait." I hung up and looked at her, "What if because I didn’t come yesterday, he doesn’t come today?"
She gave me a look, "He has loved you since high school. Remember that summer he fawned over you? Oh God, I was so in love with him. All the girls were. No one was brave enough to be around him though, not a dirty scholarship kid."
I snorted and looked out the window. My palms were sweating. She pulled up and I ran, barefoot from the SUV. My pencil skirt made it hard to run but my stride was strong enough that it ripped the skirt a bit. I pushed my legs hard as I ran into Grand Central Station. My eyes frantically scanned the benches but he wasn’t there. My heart was pounding in my throat as I spun, looking every which way.
Tears were instant. He had gone. I looked at the time, 6:30. He had waited as long as he could and then left, no doubt broken and believing I wasn’t coming.
I walked to a seat, looking like a crack addict. After a while someone walked up and placed a five-dollar bill in my hand, but I just sat there until Brandi made me leave.
I shook my head as she dragged me to the SUV, "He might come back. I should stay, in case."
She shook her head, "He isn't coming, babe."
I tried not to heave as I cried, "I just don’t get it. I had Muriel come over and threaten Daddy. She was my backup plan. I won and I still lost."
Brandi flung her phone at me, "Try again."
I dialed but it didn’t even go to voicemail. It just rang and rang. I dialed again but he didn’t answer.
"Can you go to his apartment on the Upper East Side?"
She gave me a look, "Honey, he didn’t come. There is no way he only waited half an hour. It’s Mike France. You think he came to Grand Central Station and got out without signing anything in less than an hour? That place was packed. He didn’t come. He would have been still surrounded when we got there. People would have demanded autographs."
I swallowed my pride and my pain, and nodded. She was right. He hadn’t come. He had flaked, typical hockey-star-Mike style. He probably had some puck fuck warming his hurt feelings because I never picked him.
Little did he know, I had picked him.
I looked out the window as she drove us home and tried not to be completely broken hearted.
Of course as luck would have it, “Beth”, by KISS came on. The song, the droplets of rain that fell on the window as the sky got dark, and the tearing of my soul, pretty much made up the worst moment of my life. Brandi sang along. I sniffled and watched the city lights pass me by in a stream of colors.
Saturday Night, One Week Later
"WHO IS READY TO GET THEIR DRINK ON?" Brandi screamed in the limo.
I spaced out as they all grinded against each other to the song “I Love It”, by Icona Pop. Some of the girls were hanging out the moon roof and others were just dancing hunched over. The music was so loud I could barely breathe.
A drink was put in my hand. I lifted it to my lips, trying to get out of the haze from whatever they made me take or drink. I felt like my entire body was detached.
Helena shook her ass in my face, making me smile. When we pulled up in front of the club, I was dragged out and pulled to the lineup. The bouncer was shaking hands with the ladies in our group and suddenly we were inside.
The stupid bachelorette banner and lacy hat were annoying me. I tried to pull them off but Diane pulled me onto the dance floor.
I let the shit they had given me take over. I threw my arms into the air and danced like I was twenty-one again.
Someone came up behind me, grinding against me. I let them. I tilted my head back as their hands roamed my body.
I laughed and drank whatever was put into my hands. I shook my ass and dragged my hands through my hair. It was like senior year all over again.
We started to bounce with the crowd, a sea of moving and writhing people. It was fun and free, and I knew in that moment, I would forever be a drug addict. Whatever they gave me was the best. My hair felt amazing. My body felt tight and soft at the same time. The beat of the music made my heart beat at the same time. I could feel the music as I bounced.
The hands behind me were gone suddenly. I turned to see the angry face of Will. I leapt at him, kissing his cheek, "WILLY!"
He wrapped his arms around me and whispered, "What are you doing here?"
I stepped back and showed him my banner.
He nodded, "Why was that guy grinding on you?"
I shook my head, "What guy?"
He looked annoyed as he grabbed my hand and dragged me to the bathroom. He grabbed my face, "Are you high?"
I shook my head, "I don’t know. Let's go dance."
He winced and pulled his phone out. He was shouting into it as I was bouncing to the music in the boys’ bathroom.
"SHE'S RIGHT HERE!"
I frowned, "Who is that?"
"France."
I grabbed the phone, "France, you fucker. You stood me up. I showed up at the train station and you never came. So FUCK YOU! Come party, France. It's my bachelorette party. I have to get married in a week, baby. Come save me. I love you. You son of a bitch. No, I take that back. Your mom is nice. She would have been at the train station." I turned the phone off and grabbed Will's face. My lips almost planted themselves on his.
He pushed me back and dragged me to the back of the bar, through the drink part of the bar and out into the alley out back.
The music had made me deaf. I was still bouncing to the music as he dragged me away from the bar.
"Willy, you aren’t very fun. You were more fun in South Carolina."
He looked back, "You're enough fun for us both." He was texting. I knew it was France. I pulled my hand from his, "What are you doing?"
He shook his head, "You need to go to France's place. He wants me to take you there."
I jerked my hand free, "He had his chance. You want yours, Willy?" I pulled at his belt. It seemed like the right choice.
He grabbed my hands, "You are a hot mess." He dragged me down the street, but I was in two-block shoes. I shook him off, "I can't walk anymore. These are my two-block shoes."
He stopped, looking exasperated, "What is a two-block shoe?"
I wiggled my pretty foot in the air, waving my Louboutin pump, "I can't walk more than two blocks or my feet get sore. These are fun shoes, not sport shoes."
He sighed, "You are high maintenance."
I nodded "I know."
He laughed, "I get it though, you're cute and kind of crazy. I get it."
I frowned and he flagged a cab. In the car something bad happened. I started to feel the motion of the car in a bad way. My stomach twisted. I opened the cab window and threw up out of it.
"Come on, dude. Get your girl in the window."
Will sighed, "She isn’t my girl. She's a friend's girl."
I gagged and heaved as he pulled up in front of France's apartment. I felt the lace tiara thing slip from my bed. I looked back as it bounced along the pavement. Something about it was troubling and maybe a little sobering. "My friends and sister are going to worry."
He rubbed my back, "You can message them when I get you to France, safe and sound."
"Please, don’t touch me. I don’t like to be touched." I shook my head, "He doesn’t want to see me, Will." I sat down on the seat, looking at my hands. "I'm probably interrupting something."
He sat next to me, "He just screamed at me and told me to bring you to his apartment to sleep it off. I'm guessing that means he wants to see you."
The cab stopped. Will paid and climbed out. He ran around and opened my door, offering me his hand. I hesitated before I took it, letting him close his hand around mine and pull me from the car. The cabbie sped away, screeching the tires. Will lifted me up into his arms as my knees buckled. I shook my head, "I don’t like being touched by people. I can walk." He put me down but I staggered and grabbed onto his arm for support.
