Author: Robyn Carr
“Gina...”
“No, really, Mac. Goodbye.”
“Are you mad at me?” he asked.
“I’m mad at the world! Now get out of here before I call the cops!”
“I am the cops. I think you’re losing it, Gina. Get a grip,” he said. But he left.
And she threw herself on her bed and cried.
Fifteen
When the door from the garage opened, Lou was standing in the kitchen, ready to leave for the evening. “I thought you’d never get home. Where have you been all day?”
“I checked in,” he reminded her.
“Yes, but I didn’t realize ordering a cord of firewood, checking your messages at the office and taking a look at the progress on Cooper’s bar was going to eat up six hours.”
“Am I making you late?” he asked.
“No, not yet.”
He sat down at the kitchen table. “Eve staying home tonight?”
“That’s her plan, but I think the boyfriend is coming over. You’re okay with that, right? I’m going out to dinner with my bunco partner. If I have more than a glass and a half of wine, I might stay over. I’ll text you so I don’t wake you with a ringing phone. And if I do spend the night, I’ll be home in the morning, first thing.”
“Just enjoy yourself,” he said. “Listen, you got a minute?”
“Sure. I might even have ten.”
“Can this be between us? I think it’s personal. Don’t talk to Carrie about it, all right?”
It was the look on his face more than his request that had her sitting down at the table with him. “What’s the matter?”
“I’m not sure. Gina wasn’t at the diner this morning. Stu said she called in sick, so I went to her house to check on her. She said she had a cold, but she didn’t have a cold. She was crying. And she was angry. Mad as hell. When I asked her what was wrong, she said Cooper and Sarah were holding hands. So I asked her if she had a crush on Cooper and she called me an idiot and asked me to leave.”
“Oh, Mac,” Lou said. “You’re such an idiot.”
“Now see, this is obviously some female language I don’t get. How does that make me an idiot?”
Lou leaned her chin on her hand. “Mac, do you think she’s going to wait for you forever?”
“Huh?” he asked stupidly.
“This town is amazing, isn’t it? The way we talk about everything and nothing? Some gossip takes about thirty seconds to spread worldwide and some things are kept almost religiously secret. You and Gina, Mac. Best friends for years. Closer than brother and sister. More fond than lovers. And yet, it goes nowhere? No two people more right for each other, but—”
“We’re parents, Lou. We’re friends because the kids are friends. It would be a mistake to complicate that.”
She just shook her head. “We should’ve talked about this years ago. It wouldn’t be very complicated, given the fact that you know each other better than a lot of married couples. What’s taking you so long? You’re crazy about her. And there’s absolutely no doubt she’s crazy about you. Neither of you has been even tempted by anyone else.”
He squirmed in his chair. That in itself was telling—this great, big, muscled, fearless guy, fidgeting awkwardly. “History, that’s what’s keeping us from dating. You should understand that better than anyone.”
“Excuse me, I’m a little confused. What history?”
He gave a short, humorless laugh. “How about she was dumped by the father of her baby and I was dumped by the mother of my children? That good enough? We might be a couple of people with good reason to be careful!”
Lou just looked at him for a long moment. “She was fifteen,” she said. “And you? You were only nineteen when you married your pregnant girlfriend and she was... Oh, don’t even make me go there. I have a good idea she knew exactly what she was doing. I know it’s an optimistic stretch, but you and Gina have probably grown up a lot since then. You’re obviously attracted to each other.”
“What if we dated and didn’t like each other?” he said.
“You’ll always like each other. What if you dated and realized you weren’t meant to be a couple? Grown-ups deal with that without rancor. But right now what you’ve got is a woman who has waited for you to make a move for years. Her frustration must be beyond words. And we all know you don’t have another woman anywhere.”
“We? Who, we?”
“The whole stupid town,” she said. “Seriously, Mac. There are hardly any secrets around here—no one should know that better than you.”
“Okay, now wait a minute. If everyone thinks we’re meant for each other and this close to getting together, why is she crying after years of friendship? Which, by the way, we agreed was the best thing.”
“Really? You both decided? Somehow I doubt that was Gina’s idea. But I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume it was. Then the reason for her tears would be this—Sarah and Cooper hit town, meet in an extremely complicated way, are attracted to each other and, without overthinking it, form some kind of relationship. One that puts a shine in both their eyes. Gina must have wondered what she’s done wrong. She might be thinking you don’t find her attractive or appealing.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” he said. “It’s just—” He didn’t finish.
“It’s just that you screwed up at the age of nineteen, no pun intended, and you still can’t let yourself off the hook for it?”
“It left me with quite a load—three kids and an opinionated aunt,” he said, lifting an eyebrow.
“Well, we’ve done pretty damn well with the spoils,” she said. “We’ve kept it all under control for years. Our kids are doing very well. Here’s what I think you should do, Deputy Yummy Pants. I think you should weigh how damn lucky you are that a woman as solid and beautiful and wonderful as Gina would even consider you. Most men don’t get a chance like that in a lifetime. And it sounds like she’s had just about enough.”
He just stared at her. “I might need a beer,” he finally said. He pushed back his chair but she got up, got him a bottle of beer from the refrigerator and sat back down. He twisted off the cap and took a drink. “What if I let her down?”
“You’ve never let anyone down in your life. You’ve been let down. In spades. But you’ve always lived up to your commitments.”
“Lou, I wasn’t happy.” He nearly whispered it, as if it was the deepest secret of all. “I wanted to marry Cee Jay, and I was miserable. I don’t want to risk that again.”
“I know. By now you should know what makes you happy.” She shook her head and laughed. “Talk about the pink elephant in the living room! Has no one ever asked you why you’re not hooked up with Gina?”
“No one,” he said. “Never.”
She tsked and shook her head. “Amazing. Well, you should think about all this before she gets away from you. If I were Gina, I’d be asking myself why I’m wasting my time. I’d sign on to a dating service.”
“Again?” he asked, and smiled.
“You don’t know anything. And I have to get going,” she said, standing. “We’ll talk about this again after you’ve had time to think. And listen, don’t let Eve go over to Landon’s house tonight. Sarah is working all weekend—sitting on call for emergencies or something in North Bend.”
“I know,” he said. “Cooper mentioned that. So. You always look so nice for bunco.”
She sat down. She hated this. But Lou was, if anything, fair. It was time to be honest with Mac. “I’m not going to play bunco. I’m going to meet my secret boyfriend who is ten years younger than I am, a different race than me, and happens to work with you on occasion.”
Mac smiled at her. “I know. Joe. Nice guy.”
“He told you?” she asked, horrified.
“I followed you.”
“You what?”
He gave a shrug. “I couldn’t remember ever hearing of these women you were playing bunco with in Coquille, so I followed you. I wanted to be sure you were safe.”
“Oh, for Jesus’ sake,” she said. “Why didn’t you just ask me?”
“Because you didn’t want to talk about it and, unlike you, I was letting you hold on to your privacy. And I’m willing to bet you’ve never seen Dancing with the Stars or the reruns you lock yourself in your room to watch. I can hear you talking on your phone. And giggling.”
She leaned toward him and leveled him with her mean-aunt look. “If you’re such a damn smart detective, how is it you don’t know you’re in love with Gina?”
“Let me tell you something you probably already know. When Cee Jay got pregnant, even though we were kids with hardly an income between us, I was the happiest kid alive. Wanna know why? Because I was going to get to have sex without hiding in the backseat of a car every night for the rest of my life. That’s what I thought love was, and it was a disaster. My life went to hell. I’m a tough guy—I can take it. But I can’t stand the idea of putting Gina or the kids through something like that.”
“Mac...”
“What about you, Lou? You’ve dated before. Plenty. Why are you hiding this one? Is it because Joe’s black?”
“Of course not. I like him so much, but I want you and the kids to have no doubt that I’m planning to stick this out, see everyone grown-up and on their own. And by the time I do that, I’ll be seventy. Seventy, Mac. Joe might change his mind.”
Mac smiled at her. “I bet most of this town thinks two of the most self-assured people here are you and I. I’m afraid of going after a girl and you’re afraid some guy will dump you for getting older. Which, by the way, is going to happen to him, too—getting older, I mean.”
“Not as fast,” she said grimly. “I’ve been thinking about a face-lift.”
“You’re the best-looking fifty-year-old in town.”
She smiled broadly. “Thanks, Mac. Really, thanks. Since I’m sixty.”
“I know.”
Lou let herself into Joe’s house and found him in the kitchen, chopping vegetables for a salad. She leaned in the doorway and just took him in—so tall and broad, his bald head shiny and latte-colored. He had the most wonderful eyebrows—black, arched, expressive.
He looked up and smiled. “Hello, beautiful.”
“Good, we’re staying in,” she said. “You cooked?”
“I bought a roasted chicken from the grocery, and I’m making a salad. Glass of wine?”
“A double, please. He knows, Joe. Mac knows.”
“Well, I didn’t tell him, although I wanted to.” He grabbed the chilled white out of the refrigerator and a glass from the cupboard. “Did you tell him?”
She shook her head. “Apparently he’s known for months. He followed me to one of my bunco games.”
Joe laughed. “That dog.”
“He asked me if I’m hiding you because you’re black.”
“Seriously? People hardly give a biracial couple a second glance. Did you tell him you’re hiding me because I sometimes work with him?”
She shook her head. “I told him the truth.” She took a sip of her wine. “I told him it’s because I love you and I’m afraid by the time I’m done raising my kids, his kids, I’ll be almost seventy. And you’ll finally come to your senses. When it’s too late for me to get over you.”
His lips curled in a smile and he came around the work island to face her. He put his hands on her slender waist. “I should be annoyed by that, you know. That you keep expecting me to bail out on you because of something as trivial as age. But I’m not. Know why?”
