“Look at me,” I say softly, pulling her attention away from the coffee pot. “You know my history, baby; it’s not some big secret.” Using her panties, I pull her deeper into me so she’s forced to stand on her tiptoes. “But just like when I was honest with you about what I wanted, I was honest with them.” I take a breath, kissing her softly. “I need to know now if you can handle that part of me.” I need her to understand that I'm serious; this won’t work if she second-guesses me. “I'm not going to be with you and feel like I need to tread carefully just because I have a past.”

She’s just staring at me, not saying anything. This goes on for a while. Finally, she says what I need to hear. “You’re right. I'm sorry; I can handle it. Just promise that you will always be honest with me.”

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“Promise,” I say against her mouth, sliding my hands down the inside of her panties. Pulling her up, her legs go around my waist. Her breathing picks up as I set her on the counter; my mouth is on hers, tasting, licking, and biting. When she moans, I start to pull back, kissing her more softly, not wanting it to get out of hand when I don’t have time to thoroughly appreciate her. “Go get your phone while I fix us something to eat,” I tell her, running my hands along the smooth skin of her thighs. I'm torturing myself; I need to either go take care of myself, or take a cold shower.

“Fine,” she pouts, jumping off the counter. I grab her and give her a quick kiss, then go about fixing us breakfast.

Chapter 4

Liz

“Oh, honey! I'm so glad you’re okay,” Mom says as soon as I walk into the store. I’m not sure I am okay; I feel like I’m living in an alternate universe. I’m now girlfriend to the notorious player Trevor Mayson; then this morning, before we left his house, he told me that he would be picking me up and we were, and I quote, “Going to pick out a puppy.” I don’t even have my own place. I still need to look for an apartment, and even in an apartment, I don’t need a dog; so I told him that, and he said, “We’re getting a dog; it’s what couples do.” I shook my head, trying to remember that he had never had a relationship before, so he didn’t know that people who just started dating didn’t buy living things together. They didn’t even buy an inanimate object together. My case was lost when his mouth crashed into mine and I forgot what we were arguing about.

“I'm fine, Mom. I made an appointment this morning with a specialist to get tested.” I hear laughing and turn around to see Britney and Lisa standing near the rack of scarfs. I'm sure that there will be rumors of me having some crazy disease running rampant around town by tomorrow. I look at my mom to see her watching the girls through narrow eyes. I'm not even bothered by them anymore; they’re bullies and have nothing better to do with their time. I start walking to the back of the store, when the bell over the door rings. I turn to see Trevor, Cash, and Nico walk in.

“Hey, baby,” Trevor says.

“Yo,” Cash says, giving me his carefree smile.

Nico walks in, giving me a chin lift.

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Cash and Nico walk over towards Britney and Lisa; Trevor comes right to me, his hand to my waist, pulling me a step closer. He bends, touching his mouth to mine. I automatically kiss him back, and when my eyes open, he’s smiling down at me like always. “What are you doing here?”

“We wanted to get something for Ma for her birthday, so we came here to see if you could help us out.”

“Oh, yeah. Sure, just give me a minute. I need to put my stuff down,” I tell him, trying to pull away. But his fingers have hooked on the inside of my jeans, holding me in place.

“How are you feeling?” he asks, and my heart melts into a giant puddle right there in the middle of Temptations.

“Perfect.” I say quietly, watching his face go soft. I love that he cares enough to worry about me. I turn my head; my mom is watching us, smiling like the cat that got the cream. I roll my eyes at her.

“So, Trevor,” my mom says, pushing her way between us. “I know its short notice for booking a flight, but if you can get time off, would you want to go to Jamaica for my wedding? I'm sure you could room with Liz.” She smiles, looking between us like she just solved world hunger with her suggestion.

“Mom, I'm sure he has better things to do.” I'm still trying to get used to the knowledge that he’s my boyfriend. Going to a foreign country with the guy you’re dating is right up there with picking out a puppy; you should be together a while for both. Although, the thought of watching Trevor on a beach in nothing but a pair of board shorts over a long weekend sounds like a good idea.

“Sure, I can make it,” he says. I look at my mom; she’s looking at Trevor. I blink a few times, trying to clear my head.

“You don’t have to come. I'm sure that you have a lot going on with the contract you just got,” I tell him.

“I have three brothers. It’s only three days; they can handle it.”

“Oh,” I say, wondering how the hell this is my life, and when I got sucked into Trevor’s universe.

“Tonight, after we pick our puppy, we can try to get me on the same flight as you. If they don’t have any seats left, you can change your flight to whatever one I’m on.”

“You’re getting a puppy?” my mom cries, clapping her hands.

“Someone kill me,” I mumble, looking at the ceiling.

“What honey?”

“Nothing…I'm going to put my stuff down, then help the guys pick out something for Mrs. Mayson.”

“I’ll help them while you get settled,” my mom says, putting her fingers around Trevor’s bicep. I watch her give it a squeeze, then she looks up at him smiling. “Oh my, so strong. Do you work out?” Oh my God, someone? Anyone? Save me! Trevor smiles down at my mom, answering her in the affirmative. I walk into the back room and put my stuff away. I take a minute to bang my head against the wall a few times before I walk back out into the insanity that has become my life. It’s after the guys left the store, and after my mom came back from her Trevor high, that I get a text from my brother.

Tim: Call me at this number 521-649-4579

I look to make sure my mom is still at the front of the store. “Mom, I'm going to be in the back.”

“Sure, honey.” She motions me away with a wave of her hand. I walk to the back of the store, sit down on a large box, and take a deep breath before dialing the number that he texted me.

“Liz, I need your help,” I hear Tim say through the fuzzy connection.

“You want my help, after you stole from me and Mom? Are you high?” I ask, my voice becoming louder. I stand and peek out the door to make sure my mom didn’t hear anything. Thankfully, she’s still standing behind the cash register.

“I didn’t want to do it.”

“Where is the money, Tim?”

“Listen to me,” he yells. I have never heard my brother yell before; my mouth snaps shut and my eyes close, knowing that whatever is going on is bad. Really bad.

“I know I fucked up, sis.” He doesn’t say anything else, so I take the phone away from my ear to make sure the call didn’t drop.

“Tim?”

After a few more seconds, he finally speaks, sounding completely defeated. “I have a problem, and I thought that if I could just pay off the people I owed, that I could make a clean start.”

“No,” I whisper, my head falling forward.

“I never wanted this to happen, sis. You have to believe me. I was so depressed, and it was the only thing that could make me forget. Every time I made a bet, I thought, ‘This is it. This is the last time…’”

“So you don’t have a drug problem? You’re addicted to gambling?” I want to make sure I’m hearing him right.

“Yes,” he says softly.

“Why didn’t you talk to me or Mom?”

“What was I supposed to say? I have a gambling problem, and I need money to pay off a loan shark that I stole from?”

“You could have started with that.”

“Are you listening to me at all?”

“Yes!” I yell into the phone. “I'm listening to you. I almost lost my business; I did lose my apartment. I had to get a job at a strip club to try and come up with the money that was due on my business loan.”

“You work at a strip club?” I could hear the anger in his voice.

“I did, until Trevor made me quit, and Mike gave me the money to pay my bills.”

“Mike let you work for him?”

“Are you listening to yourself right now, Tim? You have no right to be mad. I had to work there because of you.”

“I know. But Jesus, Liz, what the fuck?”

“Don’t worry about it. I'm not working there anymore. Tim, Mike gave me that money, so you’re going to have to find a way to pay him back. You need to come home.”

“I can’t come home right now.”

“Why not?”

“I told you that I was going to pay the guy off that I borrowed from. Well, I did, but he wants interest on the money. I can’t come home until I find a way to get it for him.”

“Tim, stop being stupid and come home. Get a job; maybe you can work for Mike.”

“I don’t want to bring the shit that’s following me to town, Sis.”

“How much money is it that you owe?” I ask, doing calculations in my head, trying to think of what I might have to give.

“Ten G’s.”

“What the fuck, Tim?” I yell, and then cover my mouth. “You stole over twenty from me. Did you give it all to him, or did you snort it or shoot it up? I mean, that’s a lot of money.”

“I know. That’s why I was calling. I wanted to see if you could loan me the money. I would pay him off, then come home.”

“Tim, I'm not going to send you that kind of money. I don’t even have that kind of money. Just come home and we can figure something out. We can, I just don’t know what will work. I’ll talk to Trevor,” I say, wondering if I really would talk to Trevor. He is already pissed at my brother; this would only add to his list of reasons to dislike him.

“What the fuck does Trevor Mayson have to do with this shit?”

“We’re dating, and he has a construction company. Maybe you could work for him.”

“You’re dating Trevor Mayson? Are you fucking stupid?”

“You owe a loan shark lots of money; are you fucking stupid?” Crap. I didn’t mean to say that. I close my eyes, taking a breath. “Look, I like him, and we’re seeing each other.”

“I'm going to see if I can make it to town. I’ll talk to Mike and see if I can work something out with him.”

“You need to fix this,” I whisper, tears clouding my eyes.

“I haven’t gambled in a few days, okay?” Is that what all addicts say so they can avoid talking about their problems?

“Where are you now?”

“I'm with a friend. I'm sorry, Sis. I never meant for this to happen.”

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